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MOVIE GUIDE: A
About Schmidt (2002, Alexander Payne)
Jack Nicholson is the bridge to the disturbing core in everybody, the crazed libido and sadsack aggression, and he's getting old. There's a certain distance to Payne's other movies that finally pays off here, allowing the story, its inimitable leading actor, its characters, and its welcome lack of an aversion to restrained silliness, to breathe without overreaching. At least a hundred times better than SIDEWAYS, and one of the finest movies of the last few years. (A+)
short review / RELATED: Sideways review / MENTIONED: Fanny & Alexander debate / 1000th post / I now pronounce you Alex & Jim
The Absent Minded Professor (1961, Robert Stevenson)
You can't have much aggression toward something like this, but it's not a fixture of my childhood (or rather, my father's childhood) I need to revisit. Great special effects. (B-)
The Abyss (1989, James Cameron)
Cameron in his lamest form, a screaming corpse of a movie lousy with technical proficiency but for the most part just plain lousy. (C-)
MENTIONED: summer movie preview
Adaptation (2002, Spike Jonze)
Charlie Kaufman's most personal and awe-inspiring script to date is winning, emotionally rich and confoundingly surreal. The best movie Nicolas Cage and Meryl Streep will ever make, and a must for anyone who knows the frustrations and pratfalls of creativity and pretension. (A)
short review / MENTIONED: Sideways review / The Number 23
The Addams Family (1991, Barry Sonnenfeld)
Sonnenfeld's good move is not to cash in on the charm of the characters but rather on their mythical qualities. Oh, yeah, it's still cashing in, but by playing with iconic pretty pictures and concentrating on technical design, he makes a fun movie rather than a humiliating one. It's calculation that works. (B)
Addams Family Values (1993, Barry Sonnenfeld)
The HELP! to the HARD DAY'S NIGHT original, this plays the spooky revisionists strictly for laughs, but strangely enough is significantly (and maybe accidentally?) better. Those who objected to the cheap attitudes of the original may wish to take a look at this anyway. (B+)
Adventures in Babysitting (1987, Chris Columbus)
Exactly what it sounds like, but a good deal more work than it ought to be. This actually may be Columbus' most human film. Take that however you must. (D+)
The Adventures of Baron Munchausen (1989, Terry Gilliam)
Well, he swears he didn't do any drugs. Was it worth all those millions of dollars? No. But this bizarre indulgence for Gilliam -- which essentially makes no sense -- certainly has value; turn off the sound, turn off your brain, dive in. (B)
The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1990, Renny Harlin)
Andrew Dice Clay in a Renny Harlin film. (F)
The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad (1949, Jack Kinney & Clyde Geronimi)
Sensational package feature -- Disney's last -- is marred only by the fact that the individual pieces work better on their own and deserve to be seen that way. The Wind in the Willows segment is exceedingly melancholy and beautifully drawn, but the masterpiece is The Legend of Sleepy Hollow, one of the dozen best cartoons ever made, and one of the two or three scariest. Top-class entertainment. (A-)
The Adventures of Milo & Otis (1989, Masanori Hata)
A cat and a dog chase one another around Japanese farms and stuff. Good for kids and well-photographed, but the story is just an excuse for a lot of nature photography, most of which might be better served (and more impressive) in a less precious context. (B-)
The Adventures of Robin Hood (1938, Michael Curtiz & William Keighley)
If you like this kind of thing, you'll really love this. If not, you'll at least find it worth sitting through once. Admittedly, they don't make them like this anymore. Eye-popping colors actually upstage magnificent cast, including (aside from Errol Flynn) Olivia de Havilland, Claude Rains, and Basil Rathbone. (B-)
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer (1938, Norman Taurog)
Ridiculous light undoing of Twain is no less "pure" than its source material, but doesn't add anything either. David O. Selznick dumps on the gratuitous gags in one of his strangest films. (C)
An Affair to Remember (1957, Leo McCarey)
The movie you fear every other "sophisticated" comedy you ever see will end up turning into. Cary Grant is in his element for the first half, lost and afloat in the second, which features some of the most embarrassingly cloying moments in classic Hollywood. (C-)
The African Queen (1951, John Huston)
Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn on a boat together in deepest Africa, mistrusting one another then slowly falling in love and deciding to try and take on an impossible task. What could be better? (A-)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / best movies of year / MENTIONED: Black Narcissus review
After the Fox (1966, Vittorio De Sica)
Classy Peter Sellers wackiness is unmissable for his fans, but of course doesn't have much on his work with Blake Edwards and may suffer from a mismatched performer and director. (B)
The Age of Innocence (1993, Martin Scorsese)
Endlessly dull, hamhanded attempt by Scorsese to do BARRY LYNDON or some shit; lots and lots of clichés following the Idea of Repression in 19th century society but wasting the storytelling opportunities it provides and lacking every trace of wit and intelligence that might compensate. The movie looks great, but so what? (D+)
The Agony and the Ecstacy (1965, Carol Reed)
Expansive and hugely entertaining nonsense with Michelangelo as portrayed somewhat ridiculously by Charlton Heston. Some great dialogue and splendid set design, and the bad things about it somehow make it better. (B+)
AI: Artificial Intelligence (2001, Steven Spielberg)
Stanley Kubrick and Steven Spielberg's admirably ambitious cautionary (?) tale about an emotionally needy robot played by the reliable Haley Joel Osment is a complete mess, full of ideas but no structure, emotion but no resonance. A nightmare to sit through, and there's no reward at the end for those who make it. (C-)
REVIEW / LISTED: worst of year / rated / RELATED: Minority Report review / War of the Worlds review / Saving Private Ryan review
Airplane! (1980, Jim Abrahams/David Zucker/Jerry Zucker)
Still as funny as it's reputed to be, even if you have never seen any of the movies it is making fun of, and I haven't. Presumably there's a reason it's outlived its targets. The best "ZAZ" film easily. (A)
MENTIONED: Idiocracy review
Akira (1988, Katsuhiro Otomo)
My introduction to anime, this is an action movie of sorts that would suck in live action and sucks just as much as a horribly pretentious cartoon. (C-)
Aladdin (1992, John Musker & Ron Clements)
Flat and irritating followup to BEAUTY AND THE BEAST features audaciously bad comic relief from the more-painful-than-ever Robin Williams; the fact that his segments are the only memorable part of the movie speaks for itself. Except for one very computer-generated sequence, the animation isn't great either, and the songs are worse than in any of the other Disney Renaissance features. (D+)
popularity of / MENTIONED: James & the Giant Peach review / Joe Grant obit
The Alamo (1960, John Wayne)
An overbearing behemoth, but watchable. (C)
Alice (1990, Woody Allen)
Woody's blissful, dreamy haze, a fairy tale of yuppie insecurity uprooted with magic that may not finally be necessary. The director's only out-and-out fantasy and his most magnetic film, triumphantly funny, whimsical and poignant. (A)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / best movies of year / RELATED: Purple Rose of Cairo review / Match Point review / Shadows & Fog review / Melinda & Melinda review / Hannah and Her Sisters DVD / Scoop review / MENTIONED: Sullivan's Travels review / DVD
Alice in Wonderland (1951, Clyde Geronimi & Hamilton Luske)
With the stigma attached to this in the post-acid era (thanks to its uncredited spawning of George Dunning's YELLOW SUBMARINE), it may be a difficult item to latch onto, but it's worth the trouble. Episodic though it is, it is a sumptuous and impressively disturbing version of the Lewis Carroll classic from the Disney studio, settling back into experimental mode after reasserting itself with CINDERELLA, which, significantly, has not aged nearly as well. (A)
MENTIONED: Dumbo review / Disney collecting / Labyrinth review / Cinderella review
Alien (1979, Ridley Scott)
No objections to the way Mr. Scott arranges and paces this; it begins and ends marvelously. Everything in between is a bit of a problem. While the technial mastery and the infusion of sexual imagery into sci-fi themes are both to be commended, the film in the end is just a horror story that cannot stand up to the better examples of that genre or of its pretended one without a good deal of excuse-making. All of the smart people and excellent pieces add up to a hollow, and depressing, whole. (C+)
RELATED: Gladiator review / MENTIONED: Stagecoach review
Aliens (1986, James Cameron)
Cameron's perplexing ALIEN sequel makes up for the original film's problems but drops all of its virtues as well. The result is high-octane action, and while the breakneck pacing is a fine showcase for the director and his technical staff, and makes for a fun one-time viewing, the movie is exactly like a thousand other movies. (B-)
Alien3 (1992, David Fincher)
The best director to work on the ALIEN franchise was squandered by 20th Century Fox in his attempts to do basically anything with it, so the result is a clone of the first film except nastier and more nihilistic. Fincher is a better visual stylist than Scott or Cameron, but he can do more with a Madonna video than he was permitted to do with this. (C)
Alien: Resurrection (1997, Jean-Pierre Jeunet)
You cannot blame the problems of this movie on Jeunet with any conscience, but forgive no one else. The cast and screenplay are terrible, and this time out the CG-heavy special effects are none too impressive either. No more, please. (D+)
All About Eve (1950, Joseph L. Mankiewicz)
Mankiewicz's sizzling examination of theater people and how the gradual acquisition of humanity by one oozes the life out of (and the ego into) another. It's blessed with a bruising, hilarious script, but more importantly, it's one of the most chilling, cynical films ever made, and its finale is breathless genius. Entire cast is perfect, but Anne Baxter and George Sanders reach individual peaks here. (A+)
REVIEW / DVD review / correction to review / more on DVD / Sunset Blvd. review & comparison / RELATED: No Way Out review / The Ghost & Mrs. Muir review / A Letter to Three Wives review) / Sleuth review / MENTIONED: Shattered Glass review / I Vitelloni review / Sunset Blvd. DVD review / Twentieth Century review / 1000th post
All Dogs Go to Heaven (1989, Don Bluth)
Bluth's most infuriating, offensive film has the man who once rightfully accused Disney of creative bankruptcy reaching a nadir to which they never came close, as he arranges cute animals and the afterlife into a constellation of lies for kiddies to swallow whole with the Ritalin and Lunchables. Absolutely unforgivable. (F)
MENTIONED: Brief Encounters intro
Alligator (1980, Lewis Teague)
Sledgehammer irony. (C)
All of Me (1984, Carl Reiner)
Steve Martin and Lily Tomlin's dazzling performances anchor this insightful comic masterpiece that is enough to give amnesty for the many subsequent sins of Martin and all others involved. (A)
possible remake / MENTIONED: watched
All Quiet on the Western Front (1930, Lewis Milestone)
Shattering antiwar masterpiece defines a humanism that transcends Hollywood and the motion picture business while somehow defining it in perhaps its most watershed year, 1930, when directors who could not make the transition to sound began to be tragically and systematically cut off. Locked in its time yet startlingly *permanent*; could make you cry if you have never done so at a movie. (A+)
DVD review / MENTIONED: Birth of a Nation review / Repulsion DVD / Fanny & Alexander debate / Paths of Glory review / Das Boot review / new AFI list / Saving Private Ryan review
All the President's Men (1976, Alan J. Pakula)
The ink of Watergate was still wet when this movie came off the presses, and it is enhanced to no end by its timeliness; we watch the scandal erupt, fade, and erupt again before our eyes, and we must remind ourselves constantly that it isn't fiction, because it certainly seems as if it had to be. (A)
REVIEW + DVD review / short review / DVD commentary / RELATED: Deep Throat revelation / Starting Over review / MENTIONED: Shattered Glass recommendation / Shattered Glass review / Inherit the Wind review / Zodiac review / typeface discussion / X-Files: Season One / new AFI list / Breach review
Almost Famous (2000, Cameron Crowe)
Cameron Crowe is the kind of filmmaker who thinks you care what color the wallpaper was when he got his first paid writing assignment. But he does have a knack for telling a great adolescent love story, and the rock journalism stories in this autobiographical tale offer a long-awaited glimpse into Crowe's wild past. (A-)
REVIEW / RELATED: Elizabethtown poor press reception / MENTIONED: The Ring review / Nurse Betty DVD / movie writing / Garden State review
Along Came a Spider (2001, Lee Tamahori)
Not worth your time. (C-)
Always (1989, Steven Spielberg)
Certainly not the easiest film in the world to dislike, but one of the hardest ones to like. Spielberg's attempt at romantic comedy, ten years after his attempt at wacko comedy with 1941, is so ham-fisted it may as well be a straightfaced WWII B-picture, which may or may not have been the director's intention. Either way, this technically impressive, masturbatory showcase is cold and hollow. (C)
RELATED: Twilight Zone: The Movie review / The Terminal review / Saving Private Ryan review
Amadeus (1984, Milos Forman)
The glory of the material Forman is working with does a big part of getting him past biopic trappings that he has succumbed to in other efforts. (A-)
RELATED: One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest review
Amelie (2001, Jean-Pierre Jeunet)
A cutesy, gooey cloud of fluff about a misfit girl and her mission to force the lives of those around her to improve through various forms of idle deceit. The story begins well but is hampered soon by both its lack of direction and its reliance on labored quirkiness. The same goes for Jeunet's visual style, which is opulent and flawless, and tolerable for about five minutes. (C+)
LISTED: rated
American Beauty (1999, Sam Mendes)
It's impossible to discern, for me, what is meant by this film's Larger Statements, but as a very long sitcom about a bickering family with an ironic twist, it's excellent, extremely funny, and quite slick. Strong writing from Alan Ball is overshadowed by brilliant performances by Kevin Spacey, Annette Bening, and Thora Birch. (A-)
MENTIONED: Ice Storm DVD comments / Secret Lives of Dentists & Million Dollar Baby reviews / Happiness review / Dodsworth review
American Graffiti (1973, George Lucas)
Lucas' tiresome, idyllic vision of teenage existence in the early '60s grows harder to watch as the years pass. Like the director's other boomer fantasies, it replaces insight and fun with pretension, and its humor seems designed to make people remember the time it depicts rather than the story it tells. It's no big news that the music is great, but by using it to fill his own storytelling gaps, Lucas fathers a generation or two of rotten teen movies. (D-)
MENTIONED King Kong discussion
American History X (1998, Tony Kaye)
Glorified afterschool special with a script worse than anything Ed Wood filmed is redeemed, just barely, by Edward Norton and Edward Furlong in outstanding turns as the white supremacist and his brother. But the movie's astonishingly stupid, simplistic take on racism and the causes and effects thereof makes no sense. Its leading character is supposed to be inspiring, but how can we possibly be inspired by someone who changes his mind about everything each time he has a conversation of more than five minutes with someone who feels differently? (C+)
RELATED: Red Hot Chili Peppers video in Wuzzon / MENTIONED: No Way Out review / Illusionist review / Crash review
An American in Paris (1951, Vincente Minnelli)
The plot of this wistful, opulent Gene Kelly vehicle makes very little sense, and its resolution never met a copout it couldn't sink its teeth into. But most of the way, this is still intoxicating, visually and musically. Not as sexy as SINGIN' IN THE RAIN but just as romantic. (B+)
REVIEW / initial reaction / LISTED: rated / MENTIONED: AFI classics not yet seen
American Pop (1981, Ralph Bakshi)
Bakshi's seemingly unfinished epic story about the evolution of popular music in the U.S. and, um, its effect on a family is little more than just strange and overreaching. (D+)
An American Tail (1986, Don Bluth)
As usual, Don Bluth gets by on the cheapest emotional qualities that allowed many to look past the rudimentary animation and the fact that the film has no script at all. (D+)
Amistad (1997, Steven Spielberg)
Spielberg proves he's a maverick by resisting the temptation to make this "powerful" or "inspirational." Instead, it's a slow-burn of a movie... a great and important story, told with a sense of complexity and genuine, uncompromising depth. It is not as satisfying as SCHINDLER'S LIST, but that may indeed be the point. (A-)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / best movies of year / RELATED: Minority Report review / Saving Private Ryan review
Amores Perros (2000, Alejandro Gonzales Iñarritu)
This three-episode jumble of hyperactive stuff, all of it involving dogs and miserable people, has its riveting elements -- confined exclusively to the first and last segments, the middle one being a pointless riff on idle rich angst -- but doesn't really hang together at all and goes on something like an hour longer than it should. Gael Garcia Bernal is excellent, as always. (B-)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / MENTIONED: Run Lola Run review
Anatomy of a Murder (1959, Otto Preminger)
James Stewart plays an enigmatic lawyer and jazz pianist who takes the defense on a seemingly impossible murder case in this delightful (if clinical) coutroom drama, also featuring good moments from Lee Remick, George C. Scott, Saul Bass (the title sequence), and Duke Ellington (score plus cameo). One of the first films to break the Production Code, including words such as "rape," "panties," and "bitch." (A)
REVIEW / DVD review / MENTIONED: The Wrong Man review / Witness for the Prosecution comparison / Mr. Smith Goes to Washington review
...And God Spoke (the making of...) (1993, Arthur Borman)
Unjustly forgotten mockumentary in the style of Christopher Guest except with whinier people, who are gathered to try and make a biblical epic. As funny as SPINAL TAP. (A-)
MENTIONED: 2006 movie preview
Angus (1995, Patrick Read Johnson)
It's not that much better than any other given movie of its stripe, but there is a certain humanity to it, and it has George C. Scott. (B)
Animal Farm (1955, Joy Batchelor & John Halas)
One of the all-time greatest animated films, a sardonic, chilling, engagingly designed version of George Orwell's classic satire that reaches its own conclusions. Features perhaps the most frightening sequence in any cartoon, involving a horse. (A+)
DVD announcement / DVD review in French! / MENTIONED: Lord of the Flies [1963 film] review / Chicken Run review / 'Forbidden Animation' book review / Watership Down review
Anne Frank Remembered (1995, Jon Blair)
I admired this movie for helping me appreciate her as a symbol and literary figure a bit more than I previously did; it's a very slick, well-mounted documentary. (B)
Annie (1982, John Huston)
Gaaaaaargh. (D-)
Annie Hall (1977, Woody Allen)
Winning, funny, heartbreaking movie about some Jewish guy's relationship with Diane Keaton has more leaps in chronology than MEMENTO, allowing every viewer to live this strange love affair in an emotional rather than logical fashion. Allen is not shy at all about using all sorts of time-tested movie gimmicks to his advantage, finally giving many of them a legitimate reason to exist. If you can find a flaw in this movie aside from Keaton's singing voice, you're more perceptive than I'll ever be. (A+)
RELATED: Bananas review / Hannah & Her Sisters reaction / Hannah & Her Sisters review / Interiors review / Stardust Memories review / Purple Rose of Cairo review / unseated by Hannah & Her Sisters / Melinda & Melinda review / MENTIONED: Kramer vs. Kramer review / Mr. & Mrs. Smith review / Lost in Translation review / about MPAA ratings / Modern Romance review / Love on the Run review / Starting Over review / Fanny & Alexander debate /1000th post / The Deer Hunter review / Mike Nelson's CRACKED article / Intermezzo review
Another Woman (1988, Woody Allen)
Woody drama full of great scenes and, of course, lovely performances, but it really doesn't add up to a whole lot, even with the wonderfully strange premise of a woman eavesdropping on the psychiatrist's patients next door. Worthy but unmemorable. (B+)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / RELATED: Alice review / Purple Rose of Cairo review / Melinda & Melinda review
Anzio (1968, Edward Dmytryk)
Another endless late-'60s WWII battle scene movie, notable only because it has Robert Mitchum and Peter Falk. (C)
The Apartment (1960, Billy Wilder)
The most deserving Best Picture winner in the Academy's history, this sumptuous, beautiful comedy is one of our truly life-affirming movies, featuring love that might not conquer all but gives it a fair shot. Wilder and I.A.L. Diamond's cynical, perceptive script about corporate dehumanization and extramarital screwing connects on a primal level, and never lets up on its stranglehold. (A+)
REVIEW / DVD review / quoted / RELATED: Some Like It Hot review / Double Indemnity review / Sunset Blvd. review / Billy Wilder on DVD complaint / Ninotchka review / MENTIONED: I Vitelloni review / absence from Time's 100 Best list / Barry Lyndon reaction / The Terminal review / The Terminal comparison / Birth of a Nation review / Fanny & Alexander debate / 1000th post / Little Miss Sunshine DVD
Apocalypse Now (1979, Francis Ford Coppola)
Coppola's massive Vietnam film reenacts Hell quite vividly, with Martin Sheen searching for errant soldier Marlon Brandon in the "asshole of the world." High-minded, scary, beautiful, the film is too flawed to be considered a masterpiece of any sort, the ride impossibly bumpy, the thesis muddled, almost futile. But it goes out farther on the limb for the sake of nothing more than cinema than almost any other movie. (B+)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / MENTIONED: movie reviews / New World review / The Deer Hunter review / Platoon review / Marie Antoinette review
Apollo 13 (1995, Ron Howard)
A film full of potential that wastes nearly all of it, adding no dimension or power to the story it tells; any given documentary on the subject will offer more insight. (C-)
MENTIONED: Saving Private Ryan review
The Apple Dumpling Gang (1975, Norman Tokar)
Actually I don't remember it, but I remember I hated it. (D+)
Arachnophobia (1990, Frank Marshall)
Marshall obviously had fun making this movie. Good for him. He can have it. (C-)
Armageddon (1998, Michael Bay)
It isn't so much that this film is any more insulting than most summer blockbusters, just that it's more sadistic. It's a movie bound and determined to induce migraines, and it seems almost to be designed as a model of bad filmmaking, full of fast music-video cutting, a sledgehammer-dumb story, extreme closeups, and celebrities who are there for the sake of being celebrities. For me, movies don't get a lot more overbearing and excruciating than this. (F)
MENTIONED: The Ring review / bad special effects
Around the World in Eighty Days (1956, Michael Anderson)
This is some really sleazy junk, a film so long and wasteful it is enough to make one question all kinds of things about one's life, like why the fuck you're watching this to begin with and how you will never get these three hours back. Generally I hate that kind of logic -- "wasting" or "losing" time -- but that's what movies like this will do to you. (D-)
MENTIONED: playing on TCM
The Arrival (1996, David Twohy)
Charlie Sheen in a trashy science fiction movie that may be kind of stupid but is full of ingenious visual ideas and enough enthusiasm to fill eight of these movies. I'd take this over Bay/Emmerich/Verhoeven any time. (B)
Arsenic and Old Lace (1944, Frank Capra)
Fast and furious comedy with awesome cast including Cary Grant, Peter Lorre, etc., inescapably stagy and at first unbearably twee, but becomes so insanely funny and richly entertaining after the first ten minutes that it ends up being undeniable; whether it's great cinema is up for debate, but whether it's great comedy (for most) is not. (A)
REVIEW + DVD review / very short review / MENTIONED: The Maltese Falcon review / Twentieth Century review / 1000th post
Arthur (1981, Steve Gordon)
A strange hint of death hangs over this one, which has aged rather poorly, its oddly off-key mood deepened, I'm sure, by Dudley Moore's recent death. And the song is so terrible, it's hard to even make it through the opening credits, though since I've heard the song practically every day for the last 3½ years on the Muzak machine, I'm not positive I'd still think so. (B-)
MENTIONED: fake part III from "The Critic"
As Good As It Gets (1997, James L. Brooks)
Not quite as good as it gets, actually, but one of the best times you'll ever have at the movies anyway. Only Brooks could make a romantic comedy this fucking long (130+ minutes) and justify it. (A-)
RELATED: Starting Over review / MENTIONED: Stephen on the end of the world
Attack of the 50 Ft. Woman (1958, Nathan Juran)
Some of these people are actually talented. They are wasting their time. (D+)
Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997, Jay Roach)
The trailers looked great, but this intolerably stupid (and remarkably unfunny -- it's not hit-and-miss, it's miss-and-miss-and-miss) Mike Myers vehicle will put you right to sleep. (D)
Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me (1999, Jay Roach)
More entertaining than the original but also more offensive. (D+)
Autumn Sonata (1978, Ingmar Bergman)
Ingrid Bergman and Liv Ullmann are both extraordinarily intense and satisyfing in readymade Bergman roles as overbearing mother and anguished daughter in the affected story of the general hopelessness of their relationship. Though it's startlingly direct and (of course) beautifully shot, this is a shrill and uncomfortably simplistic film that lacks Bergman's typical sense of life and subtle humor. It's also surprisingly annoying, like a family member who won't shut the fuck up. (C+)
REVIEW / LISTED: rated / RELATED: Bergman obit / MENTIONED: September review
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