CANADIAN CANDY



performed on:
Jeff Jooce wrote this lovable march. He explains: "I wrote this a long time ago. When we started making the album, everybody kept saying 'no instrumentals,' it was very clear that it was unthinkable to do a track with no lyrics. One day I just happened to be playing this and everybody turns around and says 'it's going on the album, lyrics or not.' But actually, I'd been trying to write words to it for years and I asked Nick to, but Nick wanted it to be my song. I'd always wanted to do a tribute to Neil Young, who's my hero, but everything I tried just turned so awful and sappy, and although I know Nick was right, I just wished he'd break down and write something for me. I'm from Canada and so's Neil so my first intent was to sort of get back at Skynyrd for that 'Sweet Home Alabama' crap. We ran into the surviving Skynyrd guys in Minnesota on the Goldfish Tour and they were fucking assholes, so they were fresh in our minds. That's who 'Peterson's Ranch' is making fun of also... but anyway, at one point I actually called this 'Sweet Home Canada,' but that was way too cheap, and everybody kept asking if the lyrics were done and they never were, until finally they pressed the album just with a vocal demo I'd done with the melody and just the one line I'd written plus the name of a Neil Young album. I didn't even give it the name 'Canadian Candy.' Everybody but me was very happy with its place on the album, a 'Whistle In' kind of thing. I vetoed it almost every time it appeared on a setlist. The first time they played it was when Kevin and I left the band temporarily.

"Finally, when we were getting ready for the Science Tour I was watching MTV, and I've never been much of a lyricist, but they just started coming. The tone of the tour was so bitter and sarcastic and I certainly could relate that to the old concept of the song and we ended up with a full set of lyrics I'm very happy with. We're considering using the new rewrite for the next album, and I hope we do."


[1983 version]:
Canadian candy, oh my my
Canadian candy, oh my my
Canadian candy, oh my my
Canadian candy, oh my word

Zuma
Zuma
Zuma
Zuma

[2001 version]:
alanis morissette, she's an eloquent chanteuse
i don't think it's really ironic
when i put her on she screams in my ear
i oughta know, i oughta know
but she's already won me over
thank u alanis... the other one's holdin' a cigarette
but that song in 'city of angels'
that one sucked pretty bad
and i'm here to remind you
that you weren't so great on Unplugged either

you can't ignore those barenaked ladies
'cause they sound just like blues traveler
combined with gin blossoms and spin doctors
except they're a lot stupider, yeah
and their lyrics are sledgehammer quirky whimsy delivered in long half-spoken lines like this
if I had a million dollars, I'd ban them
i'd rather go to a strip club
it's been one week since i heard them
but the impulses of fury, y'know
they don't go away so what rhymes with "blunt fag"?
i just made you say "cunt rag."

i forgot to mention
that i don't need your war machines
i don't need your war machines
and your freedom fries

but the best canadian of all
the one who'll pack 'em in
you know her name
let's rattle off her grunge rock classics
all by myself, tell him (with barbara)
my heart will go on
because you loved me
IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME YEAH!!
IT'S ALL COMING BACK TO ME NOW!!

mark and bruce were my favorites
what about you?